This blog’s original purpose was to share my journey with you as I work through and heal from my BF’s infidelity. I’ve told a few close friends about this blog as a way of “breaking the news” to them. It was just easier than saying it out loud or even through IM or email.
I know that the past couple of posts or so are about my fall. I’m still falling (even as I type this) because He and I haven’t talked about our “decision” (his or mine) and we aren’t “scheduled” to do so until tomorrow afternoon.
This morning, though, I did write him a long email telling him what I feel, have decided, I can live with. That, for me, is the first step. And, it’s possible this step leads right off the cliff so I may fall even farther. Whatever happens, no matter how long the climb I’ll then need to take, I know now that I have many friends who are throwing me lifelines.
And, more importantly, I saw a woman in the mirror this morning who is a survivor. I’ll share with you, here, what I wrote about her this morning because, though it may be just one small step up, it is still UP!
“In my morning mirror, I am beautiful. My hair is wild and pouffy. My eyes are big, round and bright. My lips, unopened for the day, are full and pouty. And, there is just a gentle flush on my cheeks from my soft pillow.
In my morning mirror, I see promise of unexpected things to come. I see hope that those things will be good and kind. I see anticipation of the excitement of a new day.
In my morning mirror, the world is new and fresh, and I feel empty and open as I step out of my bathroom to greet the new day and the challenges and wonders it will bring me.”
So, whatever tomorrow’s “appointment” will bring, I now begin my climb.